Holidazing With Barnes & Barnes

Bruce Von Stiers

In an interview from a few years back, actor / musician Billy Mumy told about the inception of the zany pop / rock duo, Barnes & Barnes. It was him and a guy named Robert Haimer hanging around and releasing some excess energy by making up and recording some offbeat, comical songs. Haimer was a huge fan of the Dr. Demento radio show & wanted to send a few of their songs to the show to get put on the air. They sent in some songs and one of them was Fish Heads, which became an instant cult classic.

The two artists quickly built up a fan base as the quirky fictional brothers, Art Barnes and Artie Barnes. The Barnes brothers were supposedly based in Lumania, a civilization sort of like Atlantis, in a sideways off-center kind of comparison.

Over the years Barnes & Barnes have recorded several albums, much to the delight of their fan base, who can't seem to get enough of the strange and delightful stuff.

This year finds Barnes & Barnes with a brand new album out. And it is a holiday album. The title is Holidaze In Lumania. And if anyone who knows anything about Barnes & Barnes could attest to, this is nothing like your grandparent's Perry Como holiday albums.

The album contains fifteen songs and has a play time of thirty-nine minutes. It was produced by Barnes & Barnes along with John Cafiero, who is the front man for Osaka Popstar. The album is being released on the Demented Punk label.

One example of the fun, tongue-in-cheek songs on the album is Santa's Gone On Strike. It's a list of grievances from Santa, including hating all the elves, wanting to shave his beard and lose some weight. All of this done with ukulele like background music.

There's some slightly cheeky songs like Jesus Is Groovy and Kwanza's Here Again.

Then there is the rocking, head bopping tune, I Am A Flying Reindeer. He's getting cool treats and you wish you were him.

A very weird, but fun tune is Santa Claus Is A Martian. He hangs out with guys from the Pentagon and actually was who crashed at Roswell. Santa's reindeer are really robots and he's noted for inappropriate behavior with elves. And other strange things Santa does are sung about in the song.

A bit dark and sad sounding is Christmas Is Coming Better Start Running.

I've Got Some Presents For Santa has a bunch of innuendo, with the guy taking off all of his clothes and waiting for Santa under the tree and other less than children friendly lyrics.

As Art and Artie are from Lumania, it makes sense to have a song called Christmas In Lumania. It is a fun song that brings forth elements of the fellows and their country's strange customs.

Other songs on the album include Why, Mommy, Why Do You Cry, Hanukah At Our House, The Angel of Death Is Near and It's Christmas Time And I Am Not With You.

Down By Candy Cane Lane is a cool and slightly bent head-bopping pop /rock tune. There are irreverent lyrics such as his girlfriend's quite a looker, that's why she's a hooker.

Another irreverent song is Horny At The Holidays. Nothing more to be said about this one.

The final song on the album is Silent Night, Holy Newt. It's a slightly twisted turn at the classic holiday tune.

Holidaze In Lumania is definitely not a holiday album for the entire family. That is, unless your family is a bit twisted. It has interesting and irreverent songs that deal with various holiday elements. But if you'd like a slightly demented view on Christmas and other end of year holidays, this will be a fun album for you.

Holidaze In Lumania can be purchased directly from Demented Punk at http://dementedpunk.com/ Or you can try to get it from your favorite music retailer. You might also want to check out the Barnes & Barnes band page on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/artandartiebarnes/


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© 2019 Bruce E Von Stiers